#i wrote this on a airplane

[disgracefulthings]

Xie Lian: I married my soulmate, San Lang!

Wei Wuxian: My soulmate is Lan Zhan, and we got married too!

Shen Qingqiu: My soulmate is a pathetic rat man who is trashier than his own writing

Wei Wuxian: ...and you married him?

Shen Qingqiu: Gross no, I married his son

Xie Lian and Wei Wuxian: ????????

[deikshen]

Shen Qingqiu who, while Shang Qinghua is recovering from some random poisoning (that demon has already died at the hands of Mobei, don't worry), is forced to spend time with Mobei-jun.

At first it's tense. He arrives, a mandatory tea out of politeness. It's usually frozen. They don't have much to talk about or anything in common except their concern for Shang Qinghua.

Except they do have in common. At some point, perhaps, Shen Qingqiu mentions some rare beast, and Mobei-jun comments that he killed a couple of those. That leads to the first long conversation the two of you can have.

The next time, Mobei-jun brings back the beast's fangs. The two return to their conversation about monsters. Mobei-jun speaks little, concisely, but he talks about how to kill those beasts, the properties of their organs, the functioning of their poisons. Shen Qingqiu shares his bestiaries and provides additional information.

Then, even when Shang Qinghua improves, Shen Qingqiu usually takes advantage of the time when he has to stay in the northern palace with his husband to, well, expand his bestiary. Mobei-jun also seems to be passionate about flora that can kill, or anything huge and dangerous. Shen Qingqiu enjoys their conversations and learns to get more than just a few words out of Mobei-jun's sullen mouth.

Of course, he actually tells Shang Qinghua:

"When your husband isn't being monosyllabic, it's a good conversation" he says simply. "I didn't know he knew so much about flora, monsters and strange beasts. When I find a rare flower and can't remember its name, I'll ask Mobei, not you."

Shang Qinghua laughs a lot at that.

"Ah, I think that's because, well, you know, inspirations and all that..."

Shen Qingqiu looks at Shang Qinghua very curiously.

"Inspirations? You created your perfect husband from scratch. Who did you get your inspiration from, Airplane bro? Spill the tea, let's see the vicious tastes of this shameless author."

Shang Qinghua laughs a little foolishly.

"Well, you see, I had this classmate in college. A very rich guy" Shang Qinghua makes a funny face as he buries in the past. "He was cold and monosyllabic, even hostile to those who were rude, but hey, he could give you an infodumping of all the monsters in The Witcher without even doing research. I heard him do it once and, man, that guy was crazy" and Shang Qinghua continues talking while, as if by omen, Shen Qingqiu begins to feel a strange sensation of vertigo. "He was kind of cute, well, not exactly my fully type, he was very tall but lacked many muscles, but he had the biggest and prettiest resting bitch face I've ever seen on anyone even my king. He always wore all those fancy clothes that cost the same as my apartment rent, those silver accessories, rings, necklaces, bracelets... His hair was also kind of long, now that I think about it, and when he wore it down it was, god, a delight. I liked him a little. He was my college crush." and Shang Qinghua shrugs, laughing. His cheeks are red and Shen Qingqiu feels that his own ears are red, too. "Cucumber bro, it's actually a bit silly. I remember this boy's last name was also Shen."

That... That's the last straw.

"You-!" and Shen Qingqiu finds himself hitting him with the fan before he realizes it. "How-? What the hell!?"

"Ow, ow, OUCH, Cucumber bro!! What's going on?!"

Shen Qingqiu feels his face burning. His hands tremble over the fan. What the fuck!?

"... Bro?!"

"That classmate of yours" Shen Qingqiu hisses, just to confirm "His name was Shen Yuan?"

Shang Qinghua blinks, confused, recalling his thoughts. Suddenly, his entire face lights up with a wide smile.

"Oh, I forgot!! Yes, that was it!!" and his gaze becomes mischievous. "You met him, too?! He was a delicious little thing, honestly, a nice round butt, he... OUCH-"

"He was me" Shen Qingqiu hisses, opening his fan and hiding behind it. He wrinkles his nose in disgust. Of all the people in the world...!

Shang Qinghua gasps, looking like he was given some vital information. His face, contrary to what Shen Qingqiu expected, does not change into horror, but into mockery.

"Oh, bro" and starts laughing out loud "BRO"

"Damn fourth-rate author, what the hell is wrong with you!!!"

"Bro, BRO, I created a part of my husband based on you!! And you're married to my son self-inserted in a power fantasy!! It's like we're indirectly married!!"

"Fuck you!!"

"Ohh, how cute!! Do you want to jump to the honeymoon already?!"

"Get away!!"

Shen Qingqiu doesn't visit Shang Qinghua again for over a month. However, he does spend some time talking about monsters with Mobei-jun while his husband takes care of the demon court (in the time he would usually use to gossip and fool around with Shang Qinghua), it's just his thing.

[nibbelraz]

The perks of your younger brother telling you the future is you can try to prevent it!

The downside is he has the weirdest names for the most important parts...

[confuzing]

SQQ: I need you to explain why you made all the demons shit parents.

SQH: It seemed like good world building at the time ok? Why are demons Like That? Bad Parents.

SQQ: You realize you've fucked them all up right?

SQH: *cringes* I know I know... The other day I mentioned my mom making me dumplings when I was little and Mobei Jun was like "To curry favor with you so you didn't crush her beneath your heels when you came to power?"

SQQ: You fucked up a whole race.

SQH: I fucked up a whole race. *Hides face in hands*

SQQ: Look at them they all think no one loves them.

[happypeachsludgeflower]

Who wants to bet Peerless Cucumber has an entire fan base within the pidw’s fandom? Potentially even bringing in a portion of pidw’s readers who just want to enjoy shen yuan just loosing it in the comments.

Like sure, some of the fandom’s definitely there for the toxic masculinity and papapa, but I guarantee you there’s an entire section dedicated to gleefully watching the fandom sewer rat being feral.

[konjiang]

Tianshang modern au

Shang Qinghua was looking for a new copy of one of his books at a local bookstore. After PIDW ended, Cucumber-bro helped him get all the money from the company. They took his royalty from him under the guise of promoting his work, but he had no control or say of how PIDW was marketed. Now that was over, he could focus on writing new stories and be a published author!

He looked up and down the danmei section and finally found the last copy on the shelf. He reached up to get it, but his fingers touched someone else. He immediately pulled back, and it would be embarrassing for him to get recognized while trying to look at his own book.

"Oh. Sorry." The tall man with curly hair said with a smirk. Shang Qinghua couldn't help but appreciate how his shirt shifted and tightened around his biceps as he grabbed the book.

"Sorry, I can't let you take the last copy. I have been waiting for months. I have to keep up with the trends. My future son-in-law rages about it. I have never heard such colorful language come out of him before." It was still weird for him to hear about how his novels are perceived because, with PIDW, no one besides Cucumber cared about the quality.

"He said it needed more world-building, yada yada, but the relationship was the main focus of the story, and the world-building around the character's life was great. It wasn't like there was no lore. " Shang Qinghua wasn't used to people openly discussing his work. It used to be confined to the safe space of online forums.

Uh-it's okay. You can have it." Shang Qinghua stuttered out. He still wasn't used to people openly discussing his work, when before, it was confined to the safe space of online forums. They continued talking about the books, and Tianlang-jun skillfully guided them to sit at a table. The whole time he spoke, this handsome man played with his hair and nudged his feet. Shang Qinghua felt like he was flirting with him, but there was no way Shang Qinghua was on his level.

"Thanks for letting me get the last copy. Let me treat you to a meal." The guy whispered into Shang Qinghua's ear as he handed him a note.

"Call me," he said with a wink before leaving.

'OMG! He was flirting with me. That can't be right!' Shang Qinghua slowly unfolds the paper, thinking he could just be getting pranked. On the paper, it had a string of numbers and a name.

'Tianlang-jun' He felt like he had heard this name somewhere but couldn't recall. He decided to just forget about it and go on with his day. A couple weeks later, when he had already been on a couple dates with Tianlang-jun, he got an email from his publisher, the Northern Desert; only then did he remember?

Tianlang-jun owned 'Realm Merger,' Northern Desert's parent company. He basically got a date with his boss's boss's boss.

'What a second... Cucumber-bro is dating Luo Binghe. And Luo Binghe is...' Shang Qinghua started laughing uncontrollably. He could pull the funniest move in history and became Cucumber-bro's other father-in-law.

[benevolenterrancy]

Dumbass thought but shizun (sy) x Tony the tiger

The Tiger Demon Lord is here to negotiate with Junshang's empress (人❛▽^) ~ ☆✧˖° It's sure to go 𝔾ℝℝℝℝℝ𝔼𝔸𝕋 °˖✧`☆

[dyed-indigo]

i may or may not have written a fanfiction

[ID: Shang Qinghua and a human Mobei-Jun wearing a doctor's coat sit at a table together eating a bowl of bugs. Mobei-Jun looks satisfied with a pair of wings sticking out of his mouth, while Shang Qinghua has a cricket leg stuck to his face and is crying. Shang Qinghua is also thinking about himself at an earlier point in time, gaming on a livestream and saying "Chat, I'm not gonna eat bugs!" /End ID]

[benevadeca]

A common fanfic trope I've seen to meow meow SJ is to make him neglectful to LBH instead of actively malicious. And I get the main rationales for it being A. The child abuse is the one hard action to justify B. If basically all the other shit he did was misunderstandings he failed to clarify it's a reasonable leap to make C. Bro ultimate hater moment how did he even have the energy to specifically target a 12 yo to the pt of working to make a fake cultivation manual that could kill him. This man is fr running on 4 hrs of sleep a week how does he have the energy. Like his favoritism is a fr trait so ofc his singled out i need to throw hands w that 12 yo would be fr but I get why sometimes people consider the degree of it to be cartoonish.

However I think that woobification could be good if it ever actually acknowledge A. Neglect is a form of abuse in fact and B. Ming fan being the scapegoat in those fics like damn maybe emotionally neglecting the teenagers under yr purview leads to issues like 'feeling the need to actively harm the competition'. Which is a fun and interesting kind of way for MF to suffer. MF being a bully bc he has learnt it is free of repercussion and actively encouraged by the figure of power he admires and who has authority over him VS MF being a bully as a form of acting out bc the only present adult figure in his life is emotionally checked out at best and actively neglectful at worst.

Idk just SJ's abuse intentionally targeted at one guy VS unintentionally causing his teenagers to feel the need to go lord of the flies for acknowledgement. Is funny. And I haven't rly seen one that goes the SJ didn't do as much abuse as claimed route that doesn't just go full tilt into oh and MF was the REAL bad guy like bro he's like 13.

[shittysawtraps]

Can you help me to animate again? I've been feeling unmotivated and I don't honestly like myself so it's probs fair that I get a push from someone

hey, speaking as a former animation major, animation is hard as hell. for me, it was always a struggle to work on a project that slowly, to put consideration into every frame, rather than blowing through it as fast as i could in order to finish it before i lost motivation. it can be very frustrating to commit yourself long-term to something that will only be a couple of minutes long.

that being said, you're not animating for current you, you're animating for future you. for the you who looks at the finished project and says, "wow, i made THAT?" it's like with any art form– you write or draw or animate or sew for the version of yourself who has forgotten how hard it was and only sees art that's cool as hell. just make something that excites you a lot, even if it's not as polished as you would want it to be, because rewatching/rereading/re-looking/re-wearing the final product will continue to excite you a lot. it's free serotonin. i still look at the archvillain animatics i made when i was 14-17, for an audience of maybe five people, and get HYPE.

idk if this helps, but you should make something that makes you feel like you just snorted coke, because even if you get frustrated making it, at the end of the process (and every time you revisit it) you will get that !!! feeling again.

[chocochococoffee]

svsss cumplane au where, in a world of hotties, qinghua is the only one that roughly looks like a "normal person". the system wasn't as nice to airplane as he had been to sy, giving him a fresh hot bod and all sorry sj ww and as he had been reborn in his own story his body had not changed much from his original one. body hair, a bit less stature, definitely more meat compared to the other clan members who could rival with a boyband

thing is, shen yuan, after seeing airplane bathing after the mushroom seeking event and rolling in moist dirt for hours, just... cant get enough of it. how you can even have leg hair, he asks airplane, to what he answers something among the lines of "shitty core didn't help and i stopped trying afterwards" and he would surely would have kept ranting until cucumber plans his enormous hands into his belly. they were warm against the cold of the water, and while shen yuans face was of blank interest while touching his soft skin and playing with his body hair, wandering upside, directly to his brown nipples, his eyes were on fire"ah", airplane thought, "i know where this is going". with a smirk, he sticked his hand directly into the others mans wet pants.

yeah gongyi xiao was around there and he had to hide telling himself he saw nothing

bringing this again because tumblr didnt like some tag. anyways i am hungry and i need more of this in svsss

[confuzing]

I woke up at 4 am last night and wrote this SQH with little MBJ snippet before passing the f out again:

SQH wrung his hands. MBJ was still crying. He'd done everything he could think of, making sure the kid wasn't too hot, feeding him, triple checking for injuries-

It wasn't like he was being too loud either. The kid's tears were near silent- just harsh breathy gasps of air in between jags where he just shook, tears streaming down his adorable round baby face.

"Are you sure you aren't hurt?" he asked helplessly. He pressed the back of his hand against MBJ's appropriately cool forehead again, like this time it would reveal the little demon's secrets.

MBJ shook his head, "I want my mama." he said before somehow crying harder.

oh.

oh but...

SQH mentally double checked his MBJ backstory - the very thing he was currently messing up- but no, yeah... He was remembering correctly.

At this point in his life MBJ's mother was already dead.

...

That was just fucking soul crushing wasn't it?

SQH sat down on the floor next to MBJ.

"Oh I'm sorry." he said, not sure if he was apologizing for the situation or his own decision a lifetime ago to write her out of the story quickly. He hadn't even had a good reason. Dead Moms were just a trope. "I'm so sorry she can't be here for you."

He reached out and pulled the little boy into his lap. MBJ flinched again, like he had every time SQH had touched him, like he was expecting the touch to hurt.

That tore at SQH'S tattered soul even more. He didn't trust himself to speak around the lump in his throat so he just hugged MBJ close and rocked him back and forth while stroking his hair and humming thoughtlessly.

After the initial flinch MBJ went utterly relaxed against him, like he was too tired to fight SQH's embrace.

Eventually MBJ's crying stopped and he dropped into the deep sleep of the truly exhausted. If SQH kept up the cuddling even after that it was nobody's business but his.

[sereneabyyss]

While I'm glad my classes are giving me more fun ideas for fucked up science in a world created by a man who doesn't know fuck all about science. Can my classes please give me the time to write said ideas please begging on my hands and knees I want to write Shen Yuan yelling at Airplane about his bad science.

Like please I just want

Sy: why the fuck did the nectar turn pink

Airplane: oh the dirt's acidic.

Sy: what

Airplane: yeah, that flower is used as an indicator of poisons, it turns pink when in the presence of acids... Word of warning, most poisons in this world are acidic.

Sy: WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU NEED ACIDIC POISONS DO YOU NOT KNOW WHAT POISON IS

Airplane: BRO BRO I NEEDED A WAY TO INDICATE THERE WAS POISON! THE NECTAR HAS PHENOLPHTHALEIN

Sy: ... YOU HACK THAT'S NOT EVEN HOW PHENOLPHTHALEIN WORKS?!

Significantly later

Sy: why does my soup smell like mac n cheese cooking

Airplane: you remember what I said about poisons being mostly acidic?

Sy: .......... I'm going to go kill a coward, and then you're next

[happypeachsludgeflower]

So, in PIDW, there was obviously wife plots that could bring back the dead (mushroom body being one of them), and since we know Airplane is a hack that reuses concepts over and over, there’s probably multiple wife plots that could work, so like, where’s the PIDW fics where Liu Qingge somehow comes back to life, memories of Shen Jiu trying to save him intact, and goes to hunt the asshole down so he can repay his life debt, and along the way accidentally clears Shen Jiu’s name of all his crimes and now everyone is convinced Shen Qingqiu is a saint.

[konjiang]

Not me thinking I would be a Cucumber-Bro if I ever transmigrated into a book, but I'll 100% be an Airplane. I read too many fanfics that I forget what's Canon.

[disgracefulthings]

Is it me or...

Is Han Sooyoung from Omniscient Reader's Viewpoint very similar to our resident hamster?